Heaven help me, I need about 20 aspirins!

First, someone made me think WAY too much this evening.  Fuckyouverymuch.  YOU owe me about seven shots of vodka and a good reason why you did this to me while I am very worn out from work and being around Bridezilla and just life-sucks-in-general bullshit.

Wow, that was a long sentence.

[Shh! Don't tell him so, but I am trying to listen to the non-BF now and still pretend I am listening to him while I am posting this. Wait, I just had to respond with "Uh huh" and sound convincing. God, this is way too much for me right now.]

Now I just ratted myself out by asking him if he knew I was blogging and then found out that now, even after nine months, he STILL DOES NOT READ THIS BLOG.  I’m safe, whew!

But I’m still kinda pissed he hasn’t read this crap yet.

I just agreed to something – I don’t know what – but now he is offering to bring the “rest of it” to my parents’ house and have a giant party.  I’m scared now.  Except maybe that means he is bringing me wine.  Then all is good!

[That Inactive Listening I do is going to backfire one of these days, and then I'll have a monkey.  Or a goat. Or agree to adopt a small child.  Any way you slice it, I'm fucked if I don't shape up soon.]

By the way, just in case any of you were missing me…I’m worse than I ever was before, and this is just the beginning.

P.S. My parents stopped by tonight to see me.  Mom: What happened to your hair?!! Me: I decided I wanted pink hair today.  Mom: What on earth is wrong with you?

If I were feeling feistier, I’d give her a laundry list of all that ails me, but suffice it to say…I’ve had it up to here with the last six weeks.  I’m back, baby!