I have been suffering from a head cold for five days now. Been sleeping it off (or trying to), which is why I am wide awake at almost two in the morning for the past few nights. I am so light-headed, I can’t even think. I don’t remember yesterday but that’s all good because it was Sunday and I’m sure nothing fabulous happened.
Or I just don’t remember because I am in this drug-induced fog. I hope nothing fabulous happened because if it did, I sure as hell want to remember it. Fuck.
Oopsy. Yesterday was Monday. Hahahaha. Better living through pharmaceuticals!
Oh hell, Bunny is gonna pay for this one! Text from her tonight when she (as always) checks in on me, especially since The Great Depression.
So I get this:
(This totally starts in the middle of the text conversation but fuck it, you don’t want to hear all the bullshit we were talking about before, because it had to do with avocados and other fruits. Or veggies. God, I can never remember how to tell the difference. Is it the seed? I’m high on Benedryl, not making much sense. Ack.)
Me: Ugh, that sucks! I hate how you can’t tell that with fruit!!
Bunny: Me either!!
(it appears we BOTH like exclamation points!!!)
But now I have an excuse to get more strawberries. I’m like Chaka on Land of the Lost.
Me: What the fuck were those lizards called?
Then I get this photo and the promise she will do her imitation of them for me some day.
Fucking Sleestak. How could I ever forget that?
Wasn’t there an episode where they took Chaka to the vet and got him neutered? Or did I just dream that?
I’m just realizing that this attorney on tonight’s Rizzoli & Isles is that gay guy who had AIDS on Melrose Place back in the day. I always thought he was hot for a blonde guy (I prefer grey hair or dark brown). Oh wow, he was in Desperate Housewives, too. I never watched that shit and hate the reality shows that spawned from that seed of Satan. Doug Savant, that is his name. I swear I thought it was Matt something. Whatever. I’m still mainlining Benedryl and I think I told my hair stylist the same story three times today while I was in the chair.
Damn, that sounds ominous. In The Chair. Like I’m being strapped down after my last meal. Which, if I really had a choice, would be a slab of amazing cheddar cheese, some chevre, a vat of wine and some tomatoes. Oh and watermelon. And hot bread drenched in butter. Damn, I am fucking hungry now!
Crap, I hate it so much when one side of my head is stopped up and one side is like all Free To Be You And Me shit. I’m an not an in between kind of girl – it’s one side of the rainbow or the other, damn it.
Yes, the meds have kicked in.
I think it is best for everyone involved that I go to bed. Now.
PS I have rewound this episode of R&I seven times now. I still don’t know what is going on. Yay for antihistamines!
Bunny, here are your damned strawberries!